This is my life

Jokes

A male coworker sent me these jokes because occasionally I will complain about my husband or my son and their very male sensibilities. Perhaps you've seen these:

W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time. " The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

THE SILENT TREATMENT
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM ." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM . Wake up." Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

I forwarded these to my sister and she told me about an incident that happened to her earlier in the week. I like her story best:


Good one, and how timely.
Yesterday I was looking out my back window when I got home from work and to my horror noticed that Mike had cut to the ground the four daylilies that I had planted in the back corners. Was I ever upset! He said he thought they were the old daffodil stalks. I can’t comprehend him making that kind of mistake especially since they were about to bloom. But of course he is a "man". I made him go with me to Home Depot and pick out four more. I thought if he took active participation in picking out and buying he would not make the same mistake next year.
This week is very slow for Mike at work so he is roaming the yard looking for things to do. I wonder what trouble he will get in to today.

Mudbogging

This is an activity my son, at a certain age (and maybe males of any age), became passionate about. Its certainly a popular sport around here when the weather is right.

My son and his friend took the pickup and a 300 gallon water tank, and emptied it into a low spot in the field behind our house. It is not prairie. It is an old pasture full of eldeberry, milkweed, and goldenrod, but it is a lovely place and I hate to see my son use it this way, but he has to have some place where he can just go crazy and do his thing. Over the past few years my son has turned it into an adventure waiting to happen, with old tires, plywood and a tractor with a bucket attachment.

I wouldn't let either boy, or their clothes in the house. I handed them the hose and a couple of towels with explicit instructions that no mud should cross the threshold.

When i look at this photo, I think of my son as a happy toddler, just being introduced to eating food on his own. I used to keep that old photo on my cork board at work, as a reminder to how far we'd gotten. He looked about the same as this picture, but the color was red, and his hair was much shorter. He had squooshed spagetti and sauce into his hair. It covered his face, his arms, and his chest. It was all over the place. Some things change but not by much.

Moochie

We have four cats. It used to be five, but George passed away (thank god!). The remaining cats are female. They are all fixed, but Moochie didn't care. He was big and friendly with a purpose(typical male). He stuck around through the winter. Long enough for me to corral him, get him in the car, and take him down to the local vet for rabies and distemper shots. I was never able to catch him again for the booster followup. In the spring I would see him a half mile away in a neighbors sheep pasture, presumably catching mice. He never came back. Probably found better digs someplace else where visits to the vet weren't mandatory.

His name is Moochie and he is a cat.